When you become a mom, all you see is
this perfect sweet child. You put your
heart and soul into loving this child.
You live in this moment that all is
perfect.. that your child is perfect..
that your family is perfect. You do all
you can to teach your child to be happy,
loving,respectful. You teach them values.
You do the best you can and then they
grow up. If you are lucky, your loving sweet
child makes all the right choices and makes
you so proud, you can't help but brag about
what a great job you have done....but sometimes
they make bad choices, they destroy themselves
but mostly they destroy your perfect family.
The pain, the shame when a friend, neighbor or
even a family member brags about their perfect child.
Then ask "How is your child". Do you tell them the
truth or do you lie to hide the shame. Do you blame
yourself... yes, you question all your choices. I
mean you must have done something wrong. Did I give
to much, to little. My sweet beautiful child made
bad choices. He not only hurt himself with these
choices but he hurt our family. The hardest day
of my life was the day, I had to kick him out of the
house. It was not easy but he knew the rules and he
choose to see if I would follow thru. I did....
4 long years, filled with ups and many many downs
went by but this last week, we were a FAMILY under
one roof. Just the 5 of us. I must say it was the
best week for me, cause I was able to spend quality
time with all my boys under one roof and there was
no drama... no pain... just healing.
You have to remember that your are not the only one who has at ups and downs and that no family is perfect. Life isn't perfect, you make the best with what you have and be happy with that. I don't look at what others have just at what I have and know in my heart I have done the best I knew how from the lession I have learned in my life experiences. Each person in life choices their own path, it is our role as parents to help guide them, but ultimately, they make the choice. I am coming to the point in my childs life where I am prepared for some disappointments and celebrations, but I just continue to be there and try and guide without being the nag. My childs path will be influenced by many, parents, friends, teachers and experiences he encounters along the way. You are great and are BRAVE GIRL! Be PROUD of your boys, cause they are trying to find their way in their own way. Love you!
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